5.31- book meeting

"I don't know if the Goth kids could handle any more sadness"

-Brian D. showing his sympathy for the homeless Goth kids that will be even more homeless when Fry St. is renovated.

5.30- brian's house

"there is nothing more boring than a white Buddhist"

-Brian Daskam showing what he learned in diversity training.

5.29- Mav's game

"if every teacher would lecture in song I would make a 4.0"

-Nate reflecting on the "Spanish speaking countries song" and other useful songs from his pedagogical giant of a Spanish teacher.

5.25- my house

"by unanimous non-decision, we go to Pei Wei"

-Brian Washam announcing that the wait is over... a winner has been selected . Finally the rest of us "whereverUwannaGOs" have someone to tell us what to do, and where we are going to eat.

5.23- graduation

"carpe everything!!!"

-a Latin challenged, overachieving TAMS student's graduation speech.

5.22- Down South

"i've been saying,
'con permis-mo' !"

-matt garretson shocked upon discovering that while he has been down in Monterrey Mexico, he has NOT been saying "excuse me" in actual spanish.




thanks to Wes Crawford for keeping watch for good quotes down Mexico-way.
love,
the quote farm

4.17- my house

"it's your WATCHBAND!!"

-Amber triumphantly exclaimed after searching my feet, shoes, and clothes for the source of an elusive stink.

5.17- training

"this presentation could use more skits"

-Amanda realizing the greatness of RA training after sitting through a 5 hour powerpoint summer conference training including such riviting topics as: how to take money, how to write recipts, and who cleans up vomit- you or the sponcer.

5.15- around UNT

stdt 1: "what kind of tree is this?"
stdt 2: "moncot?"
stdt 1: "good! now quick, how does it reproduce?"

-TAMS students playing the always fun "what kind of tree is this" game on the way to class.

Gloria Tribute Week

-"[muffled burp]...ooo I ate too much cheese"

-a DTS (dallas theological seminary) professor fondly recalling and accounting for his lunch while in front of the class.

-"I need someone to bring junk food and junk drink to class for our party."

-a health conscience but ambivalent DTS professor

-Reading a bad thesis is like having your toenails pulled out

-a DTS professor accounting the trials and tribulations of his job

5.11- Gloria Tribute Week

"My parents cut my umbilical cord with a seashell and they almost named me Alpine Meadows."

- a DTS (Dallas Theological Seminary) student's response to a professor's request to tell the class what makes you unique.






"so this is what hippies look like when they get old"

-Gloria upon seeing her hippie RVing grandmother for the first time in 13 years.

5.10- Gloria Tribute Week

"People... I did not just dream this up on a Thursday afternoon after eating a bad taco!"

- a DTS professor demanding theology inventiveness props by defending his odd-looking diagram about theological education that he drew on the board, amidst student "guffawing"

5.9- Gloria Tribute Week

"Why did it take two Boy Scouts to help the Polish grandmother across the street? She didn’t want to go."

-a DTS professor highlighting the intricacies of cultural problems in international missions with the cheery ol' Boy Scout/ Old Polish grandma joke.



"How many Americans does it take to form the majority? Exactly one if he’s paying the bill."

-a DTS professor's critical commentary on how Americans contribute to the dynamics of an int'l mission.

5.8- Gloria Tribute Week

"Holy Cow! I feel like Indiana Jones!"

-a DTS professor giving a peek into the exciting world of theology scholars, after he found his overhead marker.





"PhD stands for permanent head damage."

-a DTS professor getting creative with his acronyms



Gloria is leaving TAMS after many moons and she is to be honored for her work on the Quote Farm by an entire week of DTS professor quotes that she has worked hard all year to harvest.

5.5- front desk

"you're a friend ho"

-Emily slinging very offensive and defamatory Myspace pejoratives

5.5- staff meeting

"but I've changed!"

-Joel, an RA, defending himself after a crowd full of "oooahahagufaaa's" after he told a story about his bully days which consisted of kicking a girl in the shins and then decking her in the face when he was 6.

If you have been bullied here is some help

5.4- meeting

"if you are gonna be vain, then you might as well learn something"

-Helena, a girl's RA, on her effective information passing technique; writing important information on the hallway mirror.

5.2- Kevin's house

"how fast?......
Like ninja fast?"

-Brian Daskam inquiring if he had the dark arts ability to pour some coffee from the coffee maker while it was STILL brewing. after being warned that he would have to pour it fast otherwise the coffee would spill everywhere.

5.1- front desk

"peeing in the elevators is like a sport there"

-accounting some gross things I have had to deal with as a hall director of Kerr Hall.


"I could tell you things that would disturb your children's children"

-Joel appealing to his former Army barracks life to win the one-upping, gross-out contest.

if the picture is too obscure please see the comments.